The Primary and Pornography
The Primary and Pornography
After serving in many church leadership positions over the last 31 years, I have participated in a number of church disciplinary councils. Increasingly Internet pornography has played a part in each member’s choices leading up to the council. Virtually all grew up in the church. Most are returned missionaries and BYU school alumni. All appeared to be prepared for success, not only in this life but eternally as well. So, what happened?
Somewhere early in my latest Bishopric calling in a YSA ward, the relentless impact of Internet pornography and its soul wrenching affects on our member’s lives sank deep into my soul. How could this happen? What could be done? What could I do to help?
I researched Internet filtering. I found that even with the best filtering that money, time, and skill can create, no approach is 100% effective. In the end all filtering leaks. Today’s youth, and by youth I mean the typical newborn baby to 18 years old, are ‘digital natives’. Never knowing life without the Internet, the earliest exposure to pornography is now eight years old – the same age we can be baptized.
Pondering this over time an image formed in my mind; Internet pornography starts as a slowly dripping faucet of what appears to be pristine and clear water. It is joined with millions of other faucets, slowly dripping together forming a tidal wave of flaxen cords engulfing those most naïve and innocent, our children. You must know that the pathway to pornography is dressed in innocence, but is often just a click or two away.
Relying on today’s technology introduces eternal risks, but how do we, especially as parents, mitigate those risks, so that we can live in the world? Taking an active role in all your families computing choices and getting the best filtering you can are a good start and something many are already doing today. The most critical thing you can do though isn’t buying a software package or setting up family’s rules.
The most critical thing you can do for your children is something you probably already know; You need to help them recognize, call upon, and use the Holy Ghost in their every day lives.
Really, is that it? In short, yes. However it’s not that easy.
Like the pearl of great price worthy of the greatest sacrifice, the Holy Ghost is the single most important tool we can possess. It is our link to the greatest power in the universe. If you can access this great power, it can help you do great things. Knowing the dangers and temptations in the world today, especially those lurking in the corners of the Internet, don’t you want your children to not only have the best tool, but also to wield it in wisdom and knowledge? We don’t have to dwell in darkness. We can choose to dwell in light, and don’t you want that for yourself and your children? Don’t let the world guide them, but help them to guide themselves through their world.
Brigham Young once said, “Your eye can be deceived, so can mine; your ear can be deceived, so can mine; the touch of your hand can be deceived, so can mine; but the Spirit of God filling the creature with revelation and the light of eternity, cannot be mistaken — the revelation which comes from God is never mistaken. When an individual, filled with the Spirit Of God, declares the truth of heaven, the sheep hear that, the Spirit of the Lord pierces their innermost souls and sinks deep into their hearts; by the testimony of the Holy Ghost… light springs up within them, and they see and understand for themselves (DBY, 431)
You and your children can see and understand for yourselves, but you must learn to hear the testimony of the Holy Ghost for yourself. Learn to heed the Holy Ghost by practicing those things that bring the spirit into your lives.
From their youngest age sincerely pray regularly with your children. Let them hear, and feel, the spirit that prayer can bring. Tell them of your experiences praying and feeling the Holy Ghost. Encourage them to seek the spirit through prayer. Don’t forget that a song is a prayer unto God. Practice by singing the hymns of the Gospel together. Practice by pondering. Study and ponder the scriptures with your children. Let them see you pondering life’s issues, seeking the help of the Holy Ghost. Let them see you apply the scriptures. Work with them to do the same. Tell them what the Holy Ghost feels like to you, and help them to recognize it when they feel it. These are just a few things you can do to help your children have the Holy Ghost in their lives.
When we have the ability to recognize, call upon, and use the Holy Ghost it will, among many things, act as our own personal Internet filter. It will guide us from danger, help us find happiness and joy, and help us and our children recognize and steer clear of the pathway to pornography.
May Heavenly Father bless you as you lead your family.