If a Mormon Becomes President . . .

What if a Mormon becomes President of the United States? Not an actual Mormon mind you, a Mormon stereotype

1. Basketball hoops will have to be installed for the Inaugural ball, so there’ll be places to hang decorations.
2. Buzzers will be installed to give five-minute warnings to all White House meetings.
3. The White House front hall closet will be filled with 72-hour kits.
4. The Department of Housing and Urban Development will be renamed, The Department of Housing and Suburban Development.
5. Every Presidential speech will include visual aids.
6. To organize upcoming world events, sign-up sheets will be passed around at all Presidential meetings.
7. If a cabinet member is unable to attend a meeting, he or she will have to get a substitute.
8. All Presidential meetings will end with a “Linger Longer”.
9. Reverence leaders will be assigned to stand at the front of all Congressional and Legislative meetings.
10. All presidential State of the Nation speeches  will end with a hope that “Everyone’ll get home safely and that no harm or accident will befall anyone.”
11. FEMA will be replaced with the Relief Society.
12. To further promote goodwill, the Secretary of State will order all US Ambassadors to “Heart Attack” the front doors of  World Leaders.
13. Government meeting attendance will be taken by a Presidential clerk walking up and down the aisle while tallying hash marks on a small piece of paper.
14. White stick-figure decals of a dad, mom, some kids and the family pet will be posted on the bottom left-hand corner of the back window of the Presidential limousine.
15. Every time the President returns home from traveling overseas, a big vinyl banner will be hung  over the front door that says, “Welcome Home!”
16. All Presidential meetings will include inviting all those who have received their Eagle to sit in the Eagle’s Nest.
17. While waiting for the President to arrive at Press Conferences, journalists will play hang man.
18. The front door of the White House refrigerator will be covered with shower invitations, baby announcements, mission farewells/homecomings, and wedding invitations.
19. The nation’s Trick or Treating program will be replaced with Trunk or Treating.
20. Fry sauce will become our nation’s official National Condiment.